Pregnancy test
Parenting, pregnancy

Six things that happen when you’re trying for a baby

When you decide that you’re ready to have a baby, whether it’s your first or not, you’re filled with excitement, picturing a lovely month or two of reckless abandon in the bedroom, followed by a joyful pregnancy filled with yoga and kale smoothies, and a new little baby in your arms within the year. The reality is, however, slightly different…

  • Life is on hold. Wouldn’t it be lovely if you could just order a baby to arrive at a time that’s convenient for you? Instead, when you decide to start trying to get pregnant, you go through months, or even years, of uncertainty, during which time you don’t want to apply for new jobs, sign up to courses or commit yourself to events too far in the future, just in case this is the month you finally see that line on the pregnancy test. But at the same time…
  • You don’t want to tell anyone that you’re trying for a baby. The last thing you want is ongoing questions about whether you’re pregnant yet or not. And what if it doesn’t happen for you? You don’t want anyone at work to know in case you start getting passed over for interesting projects or promotions. You also don’t want to put the image of you having sex in anyone’s head, because, you know, no-one needs that.
  • You tell yourself you’re not going to be one of those crazy ladies who obsesses about getting pregnant and then promptly download five different apps for tracking ovulation and spend endless hours on Google searching for things like ‘food that can help you get pregnant’ and ‘early signs of pregnancy’.
  • Your attitude to sex changes. You might be in the mood for it, and then realise that your app told you that there’s a low chance of getting pregnant today, and decide to go to bed with a good book instead.
  • You remember all of the times when you were younger that you worried about getting pregnant and laugh at that poor naive girl who didn’t know how bloody hard it is to make a baby!
  • Every month you think you’re pregnant. Right up to the second your period starts, you think you’ve definitely done it this time. You feel a bit pregnant… you’re hormonal and your boobs hurt slightly. Oh no, that’s just your period. And then because you’re feeling hormonal anyway, you have a bit of a cry about it.

Or, you could just be one of those annoying people who ‘aren’t NOT trying, if you see what I mean‘. Although, that said, I think they may have it all sussed out…

Flo App
Flo App

7 thoughts on “Six things that happen when you’re trying for a baby”

  1. Very much related to this as as had almost 18 months of trying, a miscarriage and IVF before we finally had Small Boy. I found the IVF less stressful in many ways as it was all confined to a window of a few weeks of anticipation than the week after week, months after months of charting, peeing on sticks and disappointment. It’s tough on both partners but there is comfort in sharing stories.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I relate to this 100%! I drove myself insane for years.. thinking that there must be something wrong with me (although I have a 12 year old and he had 3 year old twins!) turned out that we just weren’t compatible in more ways than one and we split up… 1 year with my new partner and we are compatible in every way as I am now 6months pregnant and over the moon! I think an angel was looking out for me by not allowing it with anyone else as we couldn’t be more suited and happy! ✨


  3. This spoke to me on so many levels!! So good to read that others get it and know exactly how it feels, I am at that 6 month mark and it feels like forever, I’m not sure if I can hack another 6 months of this constant cycle! It’s such an emotional rollercoaster and a battle you face practically alone!

    Liked by 1 person

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